University Coffee Café -- Wednesday, July 7, 1999 -- 10:30pm

  "So about your problem..." she says.
  "You want to make a leap in your 
relationship with this girl, the floor 
manager here."
  "Yes that would be very nice."
  "Well, I think you need to make 
a grand gesture".
  "A grand gesture ..." he pauses. 
"Um. What does that really mean?
Give me a hint."
  "You know! Something huge, 
off-the-wall, completely different
... something that will make her run 
after you!" she says, gesturing 
expansively with her wine glass.
  He sighs. "I don't know if that 
would be appropriate..."
  I pipe in. "I have an idea!"
  "Oh no" he mumbles.
  "Yes?" she asks, eagerly.
  "Well, look!" I point to a giant 
painting hanging on the wall
by our table. 
  They look at the painting, then they
look at each other, then me. He raises 
his eyebrows, half shuts his eyes, 
says "huh?"
  "Oh, well, what I mean is that
you could take this canvas off the
wall and boldly walk out the door!
It's "off-the-wall", in two different 
ways, it's "huge", probably 16 square
feet, and it's a completely different kind
of gesture than she'd expect. And after 
you go out the door... she'd HAVE to run
after you, since she's the floor manager!"
  "Perfect!" she says.
  "Yes. Perfect." He winces.